I remember the first time I walked through my fear of becoming a sponsor and taking another man through the 12 steps. I had only six months of sobriety and felt like I had nothing to give to another alcoholic. Hundreds of questions continually popped into my head on a daily basis. Did I honestly have a spiritual experience? Was my sobriety something someone else would want? How could I ever hope to guide someone through the 12 steps? All these and more struck the very core of my being every day.
But one idea seemed to consistently out weight them all. I had taken my 3rd Step and given my life to a new power. If that life wasn’t truly mine anymore, then, as the book tells me, my new job was to be of service to others. How selfish of me to keep to myself what was so freely given to me.
Was I going to allow my selfish fears to shadow my new purpose in life? The thought seemed to strike through any fear that I had and drove me to seek out any newcomer that would have me.
The thought seemed to strike through any fear that I had and drove me to seek out any newcomer that would have me. My first protege didn’t come to me. I searched the rooms rigorously until I found him.
From that day forward we both discovered more and more about the program and ourselves as we worked through the steps. I was willing to admit when I didn’t know the answer to a question and he was ready to search for it with me. As time has gone on, I’ve noticed my fears of sponsorship have slowly turned into whispers I only hear every once in a while.
Like most of this program, the experience becomes the water that nurtures the ideas given to us by the book until they grow strong roots in our very core. With those sources comes confidence and assurance that God will always do for us what we cannot do for ourselves. So do not allow yourself to stoke the fire that is fear. If you do, all you can expect is that fire to manifest itself into reality.
The Heart and Soul of the Any Length Retreat rely on a unified Recovery Community. Guests at the Any Length Retreat guided through the 12 Steps by a Sponsor. Allowing our guests to develop the foundation for permanent sobriety.